


Pet Pals Family Guy

by sarahgirl1998



Category: Cuccioli | Pet Pals (Cartoon), Family Guy
Genre: Comedy, Gen, Humor, One Shot Collection, Parody, Screenplay/Script Format
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-27
Updated: 2018-01-09
Packaged: 2019-01-06 03:01:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12202572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahgirl1998/pseuds/sarahgirl1998
Summary: Taking the Pet Pals characters and making parodies of Family Guy scenes with them probably isn't a good idea.





	1. Pio's Advice

(Moby is reading a piece of paper. Pio comes in.)

Pio: How's it coming, dog?

Moby: Gosh, just listen to this kid's report on Great Expectations. (reading from the paper) "Miss Havisham should have 'throwed' that cake out so it don't, like, mess all up the lady's house." I, I don't know what to do. You know, society's given up on these kids, and I feel like I may be the only one who can help him.

Pio: Well, I think your problem is you're not communicating in a way that speaks to their experience. You know what you should do? (He gets out a stereo, to Moby's curiosity.) Get in there tomorrow and do the robot! 

(He turns on the stereo, which plays some techno music, and does a robotic dance.)

Moby: Wow. You know, you're right. Maybe I should just try a whole new approach. Thanks.

(Pio continues dancing for a few seconds.)

Moby: Okay, you can stop now.

Pio: I can't hear you, I'm a robot.

Moby: Come on, please knock it off.

Pio: Does not compute. (Moby switches off the stereo, turning off the music and causing Pio to bend his body downward, as though he were a robot being shut off.) Ooh...

Moby: I'm going to bed.

(He gets up and leaves.)

Pio: I do not require sleep. (Bends his body back up, as though he were a robot being turned on.) Ooh!

(He laughs, and then does a moonwalking dance.)

Pio: Let's see the kid with the hearing aid from Barney do this.


	2. Moby's Package

(Top Hat is in the living room. Moby comes in, holding a few envelopes in his paws and looking through them.)

Moby: Still no mail for me, huh?

Top Hat: Jeez, Moby, you've been going through the mail every day for a week. What are you looking for?

Moby: I'm expecting a very important package.

Top Hat: Another one? You haven't even opened the one that came for you a week ago.

(He points to Moby's package, which is a small box sitting on a small top hat.)

Moby: (irritated) You idiot, why didn't you tell me this was here?!

Top Hat: Because I've been using it as a hat weight.

Moby: A what?

Top Hat: A hat weight, Moby. My hat kept blowing away, so I put the package on it so I wouldn't lose it.

Moby: That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard! You don't wear a hat, and there's no wind in here!

(He goes over to the hat and takes the package off it. He looks at the package, but the hat flies out the window thanks to the wind.)

Top Hat: (not amused) You, sir, owe me one new hat.


	3. Pio Cannot Get Sick Right Now

(Pio walks up to Nameless.)

Pio: Alright, Nameless, I figured out a great way to get sick. I'm gonna be a woman at work who cannot get sick right now.

(Pio is in a dress and working at an office cubicle. He doubles over as he sneezes loudly.)

Pio: AH-CHOOOOOO!

(Recovering, he takes a tissue from the nearby tissue box and wipes his nose with it. Holly appears from the cubicle behind him.)

Holly: Sweetie, maybe you need to go home.

Pio: (disposes of his slightly used tissue) I'm not going home. I cannot get sick right now, I have way too much to do.

Holly: It's okay, everyone will understand.

Pio: No, I CANNOT get sick right now. There's Ambrogio's birthday, and the baby shower, and with this move-- I, I just CANNOT get sick right now. (typing at the computer) I have to finish typing this... typing this...

(Feeling tired, Pio stops typing and lays back in his chair. Holly exits her cubicle, puts her paw on Pio's shoulder and helps him out of his cubicle.)

Holly: That's it, I'm taking you home.

(As Holly and Pio walk out of the office, Diva the receptionist sneezes into a tissue.)

Diva: Ah-chyew!

Pio: (to Diva, sounding angry) YOU DID THIS TO ME!!


	4. Top Hat Narrates His Own Life

Diva: Top Hat, it's just a phase. You've gone through a few yourself, you know.

Moby: Yeah, like those two weeks you spent narrating your own life.

(Cut to Top Hat walking into the kitchen and sitting down at the table, with Diva in the room as well.)

Top Hat: I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I looked with a grimace at the questionable meal Diva had placed in front of me. Of course, I couldn't tell her how disgusted I was with her cooking, but somehow, I think she knew. Diva had always been full of energy and life, but lately I had begun to grow more aware of her aging. The bright, exuberant eyes that I had fallen in love with were now beginning to grow dull and listless with a long fatigue of a weary life--

(Diva slaps Top Hat, causing him to fall to the floor, and leaves. The sky turns from light blue to dark blue, signalling the transition from day to night. Top Hat is on the floor and rubs his head with his hand.)

Top Hat: I awoke several hours later in a daze.


End file.
